Saturday, April 5, 2008

Glamour Shots and the MidLife Crazies

Recently my Stumble Upon blog was reviewed by a young man of 32 years who must have issues with either his wife, his ex-wife, ex-girlfriend or mother.

Out of no where...this guy not only slams my picture that I use for an avatar..tagging it as a "glamour shot" and searches through all my blog posts to find the one misspelling I then tell me that I shouldn't criticize other people's copy, if I can't even spell correctly. first, I am hurt overall that I have received a red thumbs down in amongst all the other green thumbs up that I have received in the short time that I have been stumbling.

Second....Glamour Shot...who the heck does this guy think he is criticizing my picture...Glamour Shot ... indeed! Oh, is sort of a "glamour shot"....but heck...I had this picture taken back on my birthday to celebrate the fact that for a 50-year old wife and mother of five children...I still could rock with the best of them...if Christie Brinkley can do it...well, by gosh, so can I!

This gentleman...and I use this term loosely...sent me flying off into a mid-life crazies moment...
I mean...I still look pretty darn good for not having more than six hours of sleep a day in 20 odd years; my butt being perpetually flat from driving my kids here and yon; a small muffin top that the fitness instructor at the YMCA told me I'd never lose because of bearing five children, along with rapidly greying hair that my genius of a hairstylist has hidden with lovely blond highlights (I am really a brunette) and that my genes have blessed me with oily skin, which a Mary Kay lady long ago told me in a honey-sweet southern drawl: "Hon...your oily skin is a blessing not a's God's natural retinol...embrace the oil."

Yeah...right! Still...I am "embracing the oil"!

I have to admit this guy hit me in two of my sore spots; copy editing and where I am on this journey in my second adulthood.

I am a fanatic about copy editing and misspellings...I wear out my spell checker and my dictionary is dogeared. How could I have missed that "alot" is not spelled "allott"...oh, spellchecker told me that I had misspelled it. (Actually, the Blogger spell checker says that both of these words are spelled wrong.)

Lesson learned...don't trust your spell checker...look it up instead...Webster's isn't out of business yet!

But let's get back to the "Glamour Shots" issue...Why do woman feel the need or want to go and have their pictures taken like this...AND...why do you suppose that a person would not like seeing pictures in this style?

IMHO, I believe that women of all ages want to capture their elegance and beauty for one brief shining moment on film...especially if they spend most of their days running around with their hair barely combed; lucky to have their face washed and the scent of the day is eau de "Soft-n-Dri" and the uniform of the day is the newest line of women's sweats and athletic shoes from our boutique of choice...Targ`et.

Women always justify a "Glamour Shot" with..."I'm having my picture taken for my's our anniversary (his birthday, Father's day, Christmas, Valentine's Day)...ya know...he's always wanted pictures like this"...Wink, wink.

If you believe this statement, well...I own some land in Florida you might want to look at....

The main reason we get these pictures taken is to prove to ourselves that indeed we are beautiful...that our lives haven't sucked us totally dry...there is still hope...all is NOT lost AND if it is...then by God, at least we had our picture taken when we could still put the glamour in to the shot.

Let's admit it ladies...we have "Glamour Shots" taken for ourselves! WE want them...we want to look at them...we want to keep them for posterity's sake. They allow us to step out of the box. They are a reminder that we are still beautiful, alluring, sexy...we are not trapped in our wife, mommy, sister, daughter roles....we discover our power...we are women first!

We make an elegant statement!

We don't care what people think....which brings me back to our Glamour Shot critic....

You know what...I don't really care what he thinks about my picture...I didn't have it taken for him....I did have it taken for my hubby...but most of all for me. The time was right...I seized the day...and there I am in all my glory...a lot is being said in that one picture.

FYI: Merriam-Webster's Dictionary On-line: For the definition and usage of the term "alot" please go to the following link:

Photos courtesy of Kaiser Custom Images:


Infectious Grinch said...

Amy, we have all seen abusive comments left whenever there is the opportunity to leave comments. YouTube is one site that comes to mind. There is no rhyme or reason and this thing called the Internet has made it possible for the angry, bitter people to lash out. It sucks that his comment had such an impact, but I totally get it - someone looks at me the wrong way and I can analyze it for days. So chin up, keep up what you're doing and ignore the "noise". (Then tell me how you did it.)

Amy L. Harden said...

Thanks Michelle for the encouragement.

I know this article may have given you a sense that I really let this guy get to me...but as you said in your comment...internet/blogging will set us up to become targets for people such as this guy. So, instead of really letting it get me...I decided to blog about the reasons behind why women at my age...or any age for that matter choose to have our pictures taken in this way. He actually gave me a subject to write on...for this one fact...I can be grateful....other than, that he can go back to his He-Man Women Haters/Glamour Shots Club.

As for "how I do it"....a good sense of humor...the ability to meet my daily challenge with a smile...not stuffing the things that bother me...cyber-hotflashing...having a family who love me despite it all and I DO "embrace the oil"!

Most importantly, realizing that being a woman is an art with its' root in elegance...when you understand can not miss! Elegance is an attribute that comes from the inside...out. I hope that I have succeeded. Women of elegance are hard to find...few and far is my mission to help women of all ages to capture or recapture their elegance. This is why I am here.

Thanks again for commenting. Please come back again.


Anonymous said...

Since I don't have much to say about the main point of your post (other than that anyone with the time and inclination to criticize your blog and photo in such a manner needs more things to do with their time...), I'll address the spelling issue: "alot" is not a word. The phrase in question is "a lot". For the record.
Also for the record, there is no apostrophe in a possessive "its".

That concludes today's grammar lesson! ;)
Back to the glamour shots :)

JoAnn Donahue said...

Hi Amy, First and foremost You Go Lady with your bad self... Tell it like it is... I love it!!!

When people critisize they actually are feeling that way about themselves... NEVER NEVER take these judgments personally.. It's not you... It's them they see and don't like... So in the end what will get through before going on in crisis mode... Say a prayer for the broken hearted, for the lonely for the one who felt so bad they had to bring someone else into their misery... It's sad but it's ever so true!

You are beautiful in Tar'get or your beautiful gold dress I see you in now.. Your beauty is far beyon skin deep... Your beauty radiates...

Why we feel the need to have our glamour shots done is true so do it. "To Thine Own self be True"...

Peace & Love,
Jo Ann Donahue

Pattie said...

Hi Amy - Actually, I really loved this blog post because all of we mid-life women know exactly what you are talking about. If you want to learn more about living a fabulous life after 50, come see my site Let me know what you think and don't let ANYONE get you down!!!

chris said...

We all have critics. People who are anal aout grammar are usally out to prove that they are better than everybody else. So when people say, "Oh I can't stand it when people confuse they're with there or their, and loose with lose" and so on and so forth. I would usually say , "get over yourself."

I love glamour shots...

Mckay K said...

I love glamour. When I leave home, I love to dress nice. I like feeling elegant.

I was elegant as a young woman. I refuse to look as if I just left the gym.

Every picture I take is a glamour shot. Sure, I had the professional shots taken in my forties. It was fun and I looked great. Moreover, I did it for me!

As you said, thank him for giving you an idea of which to write. Little does he know, this article is not about him, it is about us!

Amy L. Harden said...

McKay K:

You go girl! You are a woman after my own heart! I would love to see all your glamour shots!


BRAND NEW Mort Fertel Program


AWEsome Store